You Have To Learn To Cope With Choice And Freedom

Recently, Roosh wrote this :

“People Should Not Be Allowed Unlimited Personal Freedom

Most Americans, if you give them freedom and a life without restrictions, will almost certainly dive head-first into a life of absolute degeneracy and vice. They will pursue fleeting pleasures of the body, including alcohol use, drug abuse, and casual sex. They will make colossal mistakes with their education that put them into debt for life. They will seek out fame, attention, and validation instead of developing genuine skill or competency. They will permanently disfigure their bodies with tattoos and ear gauges. They will experiment with homosexuality or an artificially invented gender identity. They will overindulge in food and mindless entertainment. They will not educate themselves unless there is a bag of money at the end of their efforts. They will lie, cheat, and rationalize the hurting of others. The more freedom you give to the average person, the more they will harm not only themselves but others whom they come across.

I don’t have to look farther than myself to see how damaging freedom can be. Left to my own devices without expert guidance, I picked the incorrect major in college, leading to ten years of wasted time in the field of microbiology. I pursued sexual vice for over a decade that was fun and exciting only for the moment, and which has left me with no more than a handful of meaningful human connections and memories that produce just as much lamentation as happiness. And I strained existing relations with my family and friends to nearly lose myself in third-world countries when I thought that I would “find myself” instead.”

I agree with some things, but not others:

Disagree

First of all, I don’t think unlimited freedom is the problem. USA, which he uses as an example of a free country, contains some of the most cruel prisons in the world. Also, it’s ironic that the land of the free has such a huge percentage of its population incarcerated. While Americans are free in lots of ways, they have to be careful, lest they run into major trouble created by their own government. If you ever start feeling like your life is too free of hardship, you can always find it again, easily.

Agree

He’s saying there is too much superficial kind of freedom, and too little belonging and meaning in life:

“Most humans are not capable of wisely using their freedom, and so they must be restrained and managed by rules or by those who know what’s best for that individual more than the individual himself. In the past this restraint took place with those who had a sincere investment in the person’s well-belling, such as the family, the tribe, the village, and the local church, but these restraints are long gone, released in the cultural chaos of the post-Enlightenment world. With a general trend of increasing personal freedom around the planet, the only logical result is a steadfast mental and behavioral decline of humanity. Unless people are limited in the personal decisions they’re able to make, they will continue to hurt themselves and others.”

Yes, things such as family, the village and the local church could well work. I have read that people in third world countries have a better prognosis for schizophrenia, than people in first world countries. One explanation is that third world inhabitants have closer families. I’ve also read that too many choices make us less happy. Not only does it take more brain exertion to find the best choice, it also makes people second-guess whether the choice was the right one. I can see how human psychology is better suited for much smaller-scale living than what we are faced with today. To reduce living to a smaller scale, we’d have to get rid of modern technology. That’s not going away, unless the peak oil hits.

One Can Learn to Deal with Freedom

There is one thing I like about guys on TheRedPill subreddit. If you’re introverted or shy, they tell you that you can learn to approach women. They tell you not to use introversion as an excuse not to approach, and not to give up. Many men there say they learned it. They must still be introverts, but their tolerance for social contact went way up, and their social skills improved.

I think same can be said about living life with too many choices, too little belonging and no externally imposed life-meaning. It might feel uncomfortable, but you can do it. You can learn to have self-discipline, and find your own meaning. Like in the above example, you’ll still retain your nature, but you’ll find a way to go around your human limitations and enjoy the limitless world around you. If I find any good methods for that, I will share them. So far, I got this:

1.Have principles.
That’s the only thing that can never be taken from you. That’s why religious nuts are so full of bravery and conviction. People who live only for hedonism are weakening themselves from the inside. They stand for nothing, and that’s why life starts to feel empty after a while.

2.Remember what happens when you don’t have freedom.
Remember that time when you were in some sort of trouble, or faced a very difficult challenge. Remember how you wished things were easy, as they are now. Remember how good you felt after it was over.

3.Don’t have too many goals at a time.
Multitasking strains your mental energy, as it makes you switch from one task to another, way too often. It also makes you feel like you failed, because you didn’t do all those goals in an unrealistically short time.

It’s better to do one goal in January, then another goal in February, third goal in March, etc. But if you can’t avoid too many goals, then at least restate your goals and group them together, to make them look like they are fewer (weird, but kind of works).

I welcome readers to offer more suggestions.

Posted in Personal emo stuff, Politics, Red Pill | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 7 Comments

How To Write Female Characters That Please Feminists

Looks like Joss Whedon was punished for not writing Black Widow in the way that feminists would approve of.

When it comes to writing female characters, the same rules apply as when writing male characters. It’s not extra hard. A female character can be good or bad, strong or weak. Just don’t make her boring or wooden.

It only seems extra hard, because writers allow themselves to worry about what the PC police will say. When you start worrying about that, you invite extra writers into your head, leading to the “too many cooks in the kitchen” effect. As a result, you will have a political tool, not a living, breathing character. And then it’s no wonder it’s not good.

And therefore, I think the key to pleasing feminists is to ignore them, forget them, and let your creativity flow.

http://edition.cnn.com/…/yang-joss-whedon-femini…/index.html
http://www.breitbart.com/…/avengers-director-joss-whedon-i…/

Posted in Movies&music | Tagged , , , , , , , | 25 Comments

Is Jealousy Really a Negative Emotion?

When I was a kid, I stumbled upon the realization that jealousy feels good. I couldn’t understand why everyone was saying it’s a negative emotion. I was always into self-improvement and setting up high goals for myself, so seeing someone have more than me was a big motivator. It also motivated me to covertly bring other people down, but I didn’t care back then. What can I say, conscience develops slowly. Children are somewhat sociopathic, and adults are clearly the better people.

It only hurts me now, because I wish I haven’t used my envy in destructive ways. Hurting someone who doesn’t deserve it is just uncalled for. So I suppose inappropriate reactions to jealousy can lead to eventually developing a conscience and then regretting it.

That feels negative.

grinch

Feels exactly like that

Other than that, jealousy still feels like a positive feeling to me today. It motivates me to achieve more, without hurting anyone who doesn’t deserve it. I’m also discriminating about who I feel jealous of, and what I feel jealous about. I know some things are not worth striving for, and instead dedicate my time to what is worth it. I don’t constantly feel like the grass is always greener on the other side. I never want to “be someone else”. I’m also aware that someone out there is probably jealous of me right now, in some way.

What do you think of jealousy and how do you experience it?

Posted in Personal emo stuff | Tagged , , , , , , , , , | 24 Comments

What sex would you want to be born as?

The title speaks for itself. If you could choose, would you choose to be born as the other sex, or as the one you are now? Ever thought about what you’d be like as the opposite sex?

I would prefer to stay female. Being male would make dating so much harder. Getting laid would take real effort. If it happens at all – I’m kind of introverted and awkward, so might easily end up one of those guys who has a Realdoll. I’m not sure I would mind being a MGTOW, collecting dolls, but I heard the male sexdrive is quite strong, and being celibate sucks. Perhaps I could try to become a famous perverted cartoonist, and perhaps get alpha from that. But nothing is stopping me from being a cartoonist now.

Being male would give me extra physical strength, but that’s all the advantage that I see. And one man’s stength is not enough to protect him from an attack from many men, so physical strength is not enough to make me want to be male. Men are also more likely to be violently attacked by men in the first place, so that offsets the advantage of being strong.

I would have a deep raspy voice though. Is that something to feel good about?

 

Posted in Men, Personal emo stuff, Women | Tagged , , , , , | 74 Comments

Poor, Misunderstood Dread Game

Each time a woman knows her man has other options (be it other women, friends or some hobby), it’s unintentional dread game. Each time she knows he will not tolerate bullshit if she chooses to throw some his way, it’s unintentional dread game. Although I think a blue pill feminist will disagree and say it’s just an equal relationship. I think it’s both. IMO, the argument is almost entirely semantic.

A man doesn’t have to engage in conscious manipulation to create a feeling of dread in his woman. But if he does, it’s not all wrong. To let the woman know that you don’t stick around to tolerate bullshit is just standing up for yourself. And making sure she knows you have other options is just a reminder of your value, and that you’re not needy. It’s a way to stop giving a little, when the person isn’t acting very appreciative of it.

I heard bluepillers say breaking up is better than manipulation. I think it’s highly debatable. Is it a horrible immoral evil to make someone feel uncomfortable for a while? Also, for some people, breaking up would be breaking apart a family or/and becoming impoverished. And some people just want to make it work. Might as well try one last time to fix it. You can always go back to how things were, if you don’t like it, and THEN break up.

 

 

Posted in Men, Women | Tagged , , , , , , , | 31 Comments

Why does saying sex is a need make sex a “chore”?

1.A quote from a forum where dead bedrooms are discussed:

http://www.loveshack.org/forums/romantic/marriage-life-partnerships/519009-resentful-about-so-many-years-crappy-sex-8.html#post6234085

“When something I enjoy starts becoming an obligation, I tend to start not wanting to do it anymore. I love swimming but if someone told me I MUST swim every day I will start doing it as an obligation and ultimately dislike it.

I don’t want my man’s “oil” to treat me good and care for me to be sex or BJs. I want it to be love. I don’t want to have sex with him to keep him happy and make him treat me good or care for me. I want to have sex with him cause I want him.”

2.A quote from reddit, where dead bedrooms were discussed:

http://www.reddit.com/r/PurplePillDebate/comments/327ip0/rp_advice_for_dealing_with_wives_who_withhold_sex/cq8nlr0

http://www.reddit.com/r/PurplePillDebate/comments/327ip0/rp_advice_for_dealing_with_wives_who_withhold_sex/cq8osh9

“You guys make me hate sex. You really do.”

“You make sex a chore.”

It’s just two women, but it’s interesting. What does it mean? Why would knowing that husbands want to have sex make sex such a chore? Why is hearing it’s a need or an obligation within marriage make it a chore? The simple answer could be “sex is a chore if the other person wants it more than you”. Duh. But those quotes don’t say “It’s a chore to have sex when I don’t want to”, they say “What you’re saying makes sex look like such a chore”. Like as if she wanted it before, but now that she knows husbands need it and will ask it, it’s a chore. It doesn’t feel like a chore to me, even though I know it must be done. Because it’s fun.

But at the same time, I remember reading that if you experience some kind of discomfort or pain, it feels a lot worse if you perceive it as uncontrollable. If you feel you can stop it at any time, it feels more tolerable. So perhaps if you sometimes perform duty-sex, knowing that you “must” do it makes it feel that much more unpleasant. Or what?

Or maybe hearing that husbands need sex makes them look needy (or “entitled to sex” if you’re a feminist), and that’s a giant turn-off.

Posted in Men, Red Pill, Women | Tagged , , , , , , , | 33 Comments

The Personal Is Not Political

“The personal is political” is a slogan of the student movement and the second-wave feminist movement from the late 1960s. It’s a way to remind yourself that your personal problems are connected to larger social and political structures. That is, if you change those social and political structures, your personal problems will go away.

It’s easy to see how such way of thinking can lead to wanting the state to solve all your problems. Are you a bored housewife? Make the state fix it. Somebody made you feel uncomfortable? Make the state fix it. However, I don’t think the slogan is purely bad. It’s reasonable to differentiate between purely personal problems, and those tied up with politics.

Say you can’t get laid, but it’s illegal for you to buy sex. This is both a very personal problem, and directly caused by politics.

Say you need an abortion, but it’s illegal where you live. This is also both a very personal problem, and directly caused by politics.

Yes, it’s reasonable to differentiate purely personal problems from the political and personal ones. And in my opinion, separating yourself from politics is also more mentally healthy. There is you, and there is the outside world. It’s comforting to know you have this personal space that’s reserved only for you, and no one else can control it. I believe taking “The Personal is Political” to extremes means that you always question whether your personal actions fit your ideology. Does using makeup aid the patriarchy, or hurt it? Does being fat and naked attack the patriarchy’s beauty standards, or does it just give the male gaze what it wants? Talk about performance pressure, and never truly owning yourself. It’s a way to overrate how much the tiniest of your actions affect the outside world, while you pointlessly dissipate your own energy. It’s mentally spinning your wheels. At least, this is the impression I got from many online feminists. One reason I’m writing this post is this quote by an autistic butch lesbian feminist with a BA in Women’s and gender Studies: (http://theothermccain.com/2015/03/31/gender-insanity-for-45078-a-year/ )

“Other times, honestly, I just don’t like to think about my gender as a conscious political undertaking at all. I know that “the personal is political.” I know that no action or belief can possibly be apolitical because every social institution on every scale is steeped in ideology. But sometimes I just get so tired. Sometimes I want to just be.”

Indeed, why not just be?

Posted in Feminism, Politics | Tagged , , , , , , | 10 Comments