You know, your happiness actually IS in your hands…

Tip 1:

“-How to make people happy?
– First make their lives worse, then make it like it was to begin with”

Recently, I read some articles that asserted that our happiness is in our hands. I thought about it, and it seems mostly right.

1.I think many people in the West are their worst enemy. They say “I want to achieve X”, but they don’t act like it. A lot of people have a whole lot of time on their hands, and more resources than they know. There are some people with obstacles outside themselves in their lives, but they actually seem to overcome them!

2.People also never appreciate what they do achieve. So, you achieved a degree, and a mediocre job. Well, some people are not smart enough to even do that, or don’t have the opportunity. People who live mediocre lives seem to think it can’t get any worse. But yes, it can, and once it does, they want things to be at least mediocre again.

3. If you appreciated your life and current achievements, you’d also whine a lot less about minor things. That thing that seems overwhelmingly scary right now, will it kill you? Doom you to a lifetime of torture? If not, perhaps it’s not worth so much emotion. A lot of things people complain about are only serious inside their heads. Otherwise they would be miniscule problems.

4. Imagine you lived in Zimbabwe, where you can get killed for writing a political play, and get raped and have your baby thrown into acid so “he doesn’t take revenge”. How much would you wish to have what you have now? How many of your dreams would you finally fulfill, once you escaped a highly restrictive life, and had the freedom you have now?

5. If you wanted it as much as you say you do, you’d be doing a lot more to achieve it, right now. And if you never try it, you will never know whether you have the ability or not.


This old lady has a great figure and quite a lot of muscle. If she can do it, no one else can excuse themselves by saying “I’m a hard-gainer” or “I’m too old” or “don’t have enough testosterone”.

This lady has no lower half, but she’s a car mechanic and has a family. Seems happy.

And there is my granpa. He built a dacha (Russian summer house + agricultural garden) out of planks he found on the ground everywhere, survived cancer, stroke, broken ribs, punctured lungs, although obviously he doesn’t have iron health. He’s also an inventor, a morally and physically strong guy, and incredibly good with children. He’s probably the person I look up to the most.

6.Cool links:

Deserving What You Get – Facebook Edition (although I don’t think we deserve what we get, I agree with the overall mood of the post)

Apply An Abundance Mindset To Life (that’s right, you have more resources than you think).

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11 Responses to You know, your happiness actually IS in your hands…

  1. darlingdoll says:

    “I think many people in the West are their worst enemy.”~ You’re right, they are. However, I think the crux of the problem is that they want to achieve X but don’t want to have to put in any work to get X. Americans have this sense of entitlement; they believe that everything should be handed to them. There seems to be a greater majority of people who don’t want to put in any effort, yet expect to be promoted regularly, be paid really well, essentially reap all of the benefits of hard work without actually working hard. Great post!

    • Emma the Emo says:

      Thanks 🙂

      I do wonder though, why do Americans have that? I heard about this before. Americans love to sue each other, for example.

      Here in Norway, we have a ton of government-created entitlements. Many for women, some for foreigners, and many just in general for those who earn below a certain amount. Oh, and those child protective services… One of the first things I learned when I came here, is that I can snitch on my parents to the cops if I don’t like something. I wonder if American entitlement measures up to the Norwegian one.

      • Eric says:

        “Why do Americans have that?”

        That’s a good question. I think that Ayn Rand was fairly close to the truth when she named envy as the cause.

        America is different from Russia or Norway because we’ve been around for 2-3 centuries. The country was largely built out of nothing by pioneers and entrepreneurs. I think a lot of later generations assumed that all that came about without any effort (and the socialists running our schools and media promote this idea); and that, they too, are entitled to all the benefits without any effort.

        The political parties to this egalitarian garbage too. The Conservatives, like a bunch of Fascists, talk about the supremacy of corporations; while the Liberals, like a bunch of Communists, talk about the supremacy of the community. Nobody cares about the individual; except that both sides complain loudly that the individual isn’t doing enough ‘for the good of the whole.’

        As for government entitlement programs, but what I’ve read that are far less efficient and unequally applied than anything in Europe. This situation in turn causes even more resentment and a ‘victim mentality.’

  2. Clarence says:

    I just want to state this is a very cool post and brought a smile to my face Emma. Please keep on pushing and get that degree.

  3. Liz says:

    I like this writeup, Emma. 🙂
    The first tip, though a joke, kind of makes the point. It’s all relative. Happiness is relative just as rich is relative….imagine how much it would cost in 1980 to have all the information known to man at your fingertips. Now we all have it. We’re all rich! And we use it primarily to argue with strangers haha! 🙂

    • Liz says:

      Just to add about appreciating/valuing what one has, I’m never happier than when I step into a nice hot shower. I spent a year living in South Korea with little to no hot water or water pressure…that was over ten years ago, and it still every time I feel that hot running water is like the first time I got back. I’ll bet the soldiers who survived this or that great winter feel the same about being warm…

      I like the quote, “The harder I work, the luckier I get”. Think it sums up things quite well. Success is a combination of hard work and luck (the people who rise to affluence out of poverty usually have some Cinderella story), but luck favors the prepared/hard working.

  4. I like the write up and the thoughts. Didn’t have time to check up on the link and what you wrote here till now, but definitely agree. I’m glad I made the original post – the discussions on my blog, Martels, and reading yours have been really great on how to properly convey the initial thoughts I had without antagonizing people needlessly (though I remain unsure if they’re not not antagonized due to my on ability to express myself or their lack of critical thinking in terms of what I’m really saying)

    • emmatheemo says:

      Well, there was nothing to become antagonized about 🙂 But I have the same feeling often, and since it’s he internet, it’s not that big of a deal if someone is easily irritated.
      Expressing something in an accessible manner can be hard. One of my teachers said scientists are good at science, but terrible at presenting their results. So he advised us to use less text in our presentations. I think this tip might apply to blogging too. I hope this doesn’t offend you, but you and some other bloggers use very long sentenses and the words are arranged strangely sometimes. Not saying my writing is great, but it’s something that always helps.

      • Hah. Working on it. It’s simply weird because I’m not nearly… as long winded and in my head in person. But writing on the blog and in comments I am.

  5. Reblogged this on By the Mighty Mumford and commented:

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