Makeup is like masturbation

Women put on makeup for various reasons. Some are makeup artists, passionate about their art. Some do so for their jobs, as is the case with porn stars. Others so it to please their husbands, even if those already know how their wives look like without. And some do it because they are so disfigured that it’s plain necessary to attract a man.

But it seems most women wear it because they want to cover their flaws. When all other women wear makeup, covering up the flaws we know they have, a woman can’t afford to quit, or she will look bad by comparison.

And this is the shittiest reason to wear makeup of them all (all the others being quite ok). I came upon the realization that it’s like masturbation it many ways.

Masturbation is a stop gap for something else you wish you had, but don’t have. So is makeup.

Masturbation is “good at first, but in the end, you’re only fucking yourself”. Same with makeup. It temporarily feels good to look better with some simple tricks, but it brings no ongoing satisfaction. Because the look only lasts a day. But you (man) know that just because you jerked off, you haven’t actually fucked anyone. And you (woman) know that just because you put on makeup, you haven’t actually turned prettier.

Masturbation can addict you. So can makeup. Masturbation can make you stop trying to have sex with real women, and makeup can make you stop trying to look good on your own. What’s that, dark eye circles from too little sleep and too much late drinking? Lets cover it up, no need to be healthier.

In the western world, most people don’t associate masturbation or makeup with shame, but I think a great deal of people still experience shame when they do those things. Men who masturbate, because they feel like a sexual loser deep down [EDIT: I’m talking about men who don’t get laid much, if someone misunderstands]. Women who put on makeup, because of the exact same reason.

Men have their nofap movement, how about women have a nomakeup movement? Sounds an awful lot like a feminist anti-beauty thing, perhaps? I guess in a way it does, which is why what I have in mind is different. I wouldn’t protest women dolling up for their men. Or for their porn work. However, there is no weighty reason to wear it for everyone else. They are not your husband, they are just strangers. Being clean and presentable should be enough.

Another thing I wish women could do, is not have to rely on makeup to look good. I think this is possible, but needs work, like makeup does. Lots of women say they don’t look good without makeup, but the same say those who are inexperienced with makeup, and thus make mistakes. If you spent all the money you spend on makeup, on a dermatologist and some procedures (no, not necessarily surgery, there is other stuff), you’d probably be happier now.

Third, makeup raises the beauty of all women by a point or two, clogs everyone’s pores, and thus no one gets ahead, and no one wins.

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36 Responses to Makeup is like masturbation

  1. I view women’s make up like I view the Game idea of peacocking.

    A little bit is good as long as it exemplifies who you are. It is a subtle highlight of the best parts of you. Too much and you’re try hard. You might get attention, but it will be the wrong sort of attention.

    • emmatheemo says:

      I don’t entirely view it that way, although I see the analogy. Perhaps the reason why I don’t quite agree, is because makeup is much faker than game. You can internalize game. You can’t “internalize” makeup. The long-term goal of game, at least according to bloggers like Rollo, is to internalize it. Not fake it till you make it, fake it till you become it.

      Perhaps what I’m advocating is what Rollo advocates.

      • Hmmm, I see your point. The hard thing is that makeup can be attractive, and even bad make up will get attention from men. Though only of the ‘she’s easy’ variety. Masturbation in men, however, is never attractive.

      • emmatheemo says:

        Haha, true. I was emphasizing the bad parts of the makeup to illustrate my point.

      • All good. I liked it or I wouldn’t have commented. Selfish women do all sorts of crazy things, and bad make up is certainly one of them.

  2. ar10308 says:

    Make-up and masturbation can both be used to give facials…

  3. M3 says:

    I think well done makeup (just a touch to accentuate, the barely there look) is like a dude wearing a sharp suit. Both come off at the end of the day.

    If a woman cakes it on like a whore covering up severe flaws (physical or self esteem) is the equivalent of a dude wearing a Pimp Daddy complete with top hat, feather boa, sparkle suit, crocodile slippers, a cape, and 50 tons of bling.

    • emmatheemo says:

      I jus came up with something, after thinking about the suit/makeup analogy. I don’t quite accept it. Suit is obviously not a part of the man’s body (unless it contains parts that make you look buffer/slimmer than you are). Makeup can be so deceptive that a man will think that this is actually what you look like!
      And this is the problem I have with it. It’s so much faker and thus can create a bigger disappointment, when it comes off.

  4. Strange shaming comparison to make between women putting on make-up and male masturbation Emma.

    Putting on make-up is the costly and laborious attempt by women to deceive men through means of false sexual signals the fake message that they are still ripe and pretty young girls.

    Male masturbation is the simple, cost free, and extremely pleasurable relief of a primitive sexual urge in order that one can go about the day focused upon more important matters than the opposite sex.

    Although I understand this analysis would be at odds with your thesis that old hags have more sexual power than male rock stars.

    Would you like to see (other) women wearing the burqa too?

    • Emma the Emo says:

      I’m sorry, but you will have to explain, point by point, what you mean with your comment.

      “Strange shaming comparison to make between women putting on make-up and male masturbation Emma.”
      What is shaming about this post? I was just being honest and observant (I hope). I think it might resonate with many people. If you’re talking about the part where I said “masturbation can make you feel like a sexual loser”, this is likely a fact. That is, if you aren’t getting laid. The whole point of the analogy is that being ugly&putting makeup on feels the same as being sexless&jerking off. Being sexed regularly&masturbating probably feels fine, just like a pretty girl in makeup feels good about herself. Of course, many men are ok with just masturbation, and many women are happy with just the fake type of beauty, but I just don’t think they are common!

      “Male masturbation is the simple, cost free, and extremely pleasurable relief of a primitive sexual urge in order that one can go about the day focused upon more important matters than the opposite sex.”
      Sure, nothing to disagree with here,

      “Although I understand this analysis would be at odds with your thesis that old hags have more sexual power than male rock stars.”
      How so?

      “Would you like to see (other) women wearing the burqa too?”
      I don’t understand how that has anything to do with my post. My idea is not anti-beauty, the same way nofap is not anti-sexual-pleasure. These are merely about increasing beauty (or pleasure) in the long run. And gaining other positive effects.

      • Schopenbecq says:

        “I’m sorry, but you will have to explain, point by point, what you mean with your comment.”

        If men feel like sexual losers for masturbating, then it might have something to do with the fact that women tell them they are sexual losers for masturbating (hint hint).

        A man can log onto a free tube site, and get instant sexual satisfaction through 10 minutes jerking off to good quality porn, yet the average woman spends a whole year of her life putting on makeup, spends over 100,000 euros during her lifetime on buying makeup in the knowledge that she won’t be able to attract a mate (i.e. have sexual satisfaction) otherwise.

        Really, who has ‘100%’ sexual power again?

        Male masturbation is an alternative to sexually competing with other men.

        Women putting on makeup is women competing sexually with other women.

        They are actually opposites, not similar. Women deciding not to wear makeup would be closer to male masturbation, except no sexual satisfaction could be gained from it.

        http://www.dailymail.co.uk/femail/article-2281621/Thats-LOT-mirror-time-Women-spend-year-lives-applying-make-up.html

      • Emma the Emo says:

        “If men feel like sexual losers for masturbating, then it might have something to do with the fact that women tell them they are sexual losers for masturbating (hint hint).”

        I don’t think most involuntarily sexless men feel like winners. Those that are ok with no women – I have no problem with them. Whether they masturbate or not, they are free and don’t have a need other men have. I was not telling men they are losers if they masturbate. I was just describing observable reality.

        Don’t tell me most sexless men would feel like winners, if only they were told masturbation due to sexlessness is winning. That’s the type of logic fat acceptance is based on. “If we only tell women fat is beautiful, they will stop having anorexia, bulimia, being so obsessed with their looks, etc.”. Yeah, right. I think men must have developed some bullshit meters against that. If you fall for it, someone else will be banging all the babes, while you sit and think you’re “winning”. But if you really feel like a winner then, good for you. You’re special.

        “…spends over 100,000 euros during her lifetime on buying makeup in the knowledge that she won’t be able to attract a mate (i.e. have sexual satisfaction) otherwise.”

        Women don’t need makeup to get a mate, unless they are truly physically ugly. Although one can say they often don’t get the mates of the SMV they want.

    • emmatheemo says:

      Btw, I don’t think I said old hags have more SMV than male rock stars.. have I? I think I only said that female average SMV is always (at any age) higher than the average male SMV.

    • :-p says:

      “Putting on make-up is the costly and laborious attempt by women to deceive men through means of false sexual signals the fake message that they are still ripe and pretty young girls.”

      http://www.google.no/url?sa=t&rct=j&q=&esrc=s&frm=1&source=web&cd=10&cad=rja&ved=0CGQQFjAJ&url=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.womansday.com%2Fstyle-beauty%2Fbeauty-tips-products%2Flook-younger-now&ei=xRYqUr_TB8GK4wTx4YCQBw&usg=AFQjCNHUICFd3zXRmiRjlmcJ27-OmxT91A

  5. I used to think of make-up in a similar way- like I was being fake. But now I just think of it as putting my best face forward–inn the same way the M3 likens it to a nice suit on a man. My husband likes it when I put make-up on, wear a dress and curl my hair. I do it to look nice for him and to feel good about myself. Nothing wrong about that in my humble opinion. Masturbation is about self-gratification. But looking nice isn’t something I do just for myself, though I do benefit from it.

    People also judge us on a variety of factors- the first being our appearance. I find it much easier to go through life well groomed and fit- people tend to be nicer to people they find attractive. Shallow maybe, but just the way things are.

    • emmatheemo says:

      Right. But as you can see, I don’t have anything against makeup for the sake of pleasing your man. He already knows what you really look like.

      I also think makeup for the sake of the job is ok, as it’s just a tool. But I think a lot of women could gain something by either realizing they don’t need makeup to look well, or to make it so. Men don’t need makeup, and they look great. Of course one can wear makeup even when one doesn’t need it. But feeling like you need it is the thing I don’t like.

      • To me make-up is just part of the culture. It’s one of the tools women use to look and feel good. Like high heels. Or a flashy suit and tie for a man. I remember looking at National Geographic magazines when I was a kid and couldn’t believe the pictures of the women in certain African and Asian cultures that wore the neck rings to elongate their necks- but that was considered beautiful in their society. I believe there are others in which the women blacken their teeth.

        We’re lucky- we can wash off our make-up and take off our heels. Though I hate heels with a passion.

      • emmatheemo says:

        Heh, I know, all that stuff about long necks is kind of frightening. But then, europeans used to drip belladonna into their eyes, and wear corsets.
        I guess this is what I don’t like about this reason to wear makeup. It’s being done not as a practical tool, not to please the most important person in their lives, but because they will feel bad not doing it, when everyone around them is doing it.

      • We’re lucky when you think about it. It might be the cultural norm to wear make-up, but how much and how often is really up the wearer. I know women who don’t wear any and no one really notices because it’s their normal.

        Imagine living in a society where you were expected to wear the neck rings. It would be mighty noticeable if you were the one woman who chose to opt out.

      • emmatheemo says:

        Yeah, the freedom of choice is a beautiful thing 🙂 But then again, walking around topless will get you arrested : /

        ” I know women who don’t wear any and no one really notices because it’s their normal.”

        That is what I want to aim for.

    • emmatheemo says:

      About groomed and fit. That is actually what I think can make makeup unnecessary (but you can still wear makeup then, just saying that it’s effective at that).

  6. ” I know women who don’t wear any and no one really notices because it’s their normal.”
    That is what I want to aim for.

    Nothing wrong with that. I don’t wear much myself. My husband is much more turned on by nice hair, and I’m lucky to be blessed with great hair. I love my hair because it’s a natural asset and I don’t need to change much to make it look good. But I’m a big believer in doing what makes us comfortable in our own skin. I’m not particularly fashionable and I tend to dress in comfortable, sensible clothes. Thankfully my husband likes me that way. My daughter is a lot like me and I’m glad I can respect and appreciate her the way she is. My mom was the total opposite of me. Fake boobs, bleached hair and tight clothing defined her look. My mom was the only mom I knew who tried to get her daughter to wear *shorter* skirts. Which is probably why I tend to be more conservative in my look now.

    Judging by your profile pic you’re lovely without make-up.

  7. Liz says:

    Hm. My dad was old, and “old school” and believed that wearing contact lenses was cheating because everyone should know you have an eye impairment. I wasn’t allowed to wear makeup growing up, nor any hair “blandishments” (though I did lay out in the sun with lemon juice, worked great for turning my mousy medium blonde to light blonde).
    From my perspective, anything that makes you feel better about yourself is fine. Clothes, hair, makeup…the people we see in the magazines are airbrushed, plucked, and practically not even human at the end of the photoshop. That’s the standard. I met Megan Fox and she looked about like every other girl I grew up with (and that was on the photo shoot with makeup and hair extensions).
    My husband loves me au naturale, I actually fight for my “right” to use makeup when I leave the house (lots of trophy wives in this town, I’d feel naked without something on my face in this environment). And I only use three products…face powder, eye liner and lipstick.

    • emmatheemo says:

      Anyone can do anything they want. But I’m pretty convinced that using makeup because you’re self-concsious without (and you have a good face) is kind of an internal weakness. Wearing it because everyone else is wearing it, and you’re scared to go against that. Or, wearing it because it makes you feel confident in every day life. It should not be a part of what your everyday confidence depends on. It’s too temporary and fake. Let me explain what I mean by fake. I don’t mean that “it’s bad to have a fake face, because it’s deceiving everyone”. Nah. I think it’s bad to have a fake face that lasts only one day, and base confidence on it, because it’s deceiving you. Men often complain how game means they have to “quit being themselves” and always pretend they are someone else. But later they discover they are capable of internalizing their new alphaness, and it’s no longer pretence. But women, even if they gain confidence from makeup, can never internalize makeup. It always remains a mask, so I don’t understand why someone would want to base their confidence on a mask?

      Sorry for mini-rant. I’m not saying I have none internal weaknesses whatsoever myself. Hopefully this comment will not be taken as an attack. Btw, contact lenses are another matter, IMO, as they have a much more practical value.

      I’m also not against all makeup, but I wanted to show that some reasons for using it can be stopping women from true confidence.

      • Liz says:

        “But women, even if they gain confidence from makeup, can never internalize makeup. It always remains a mask, so I don’t understand why someone would want to base their confidence on a mask?”

        If I didn’t have a hand, I’d probably wear a prosthetic one in public even if it served no useful purpose beyond appearance and I took it off when I was home. Same with a wig (or scarf around my head) if I were balding. Even though I suppose it would be more “noble” and self-confident to just go around without. People are treated differently based on appearance and that’s the main reason people alter it, even if only temporarily.

      • emmatheemo says:

        Wanting to achieve a specific reaction from people by wearing a mask is one thing. Deriving confidence from it is another. And not relying on it for confidence does not mean you must quit wearing it for any other reason.

      • Liz says:

        “Wanting to achieve a specific reaction from people by wearing a mask is one thing. Deriving confidence from it is another.”

        I don’t follow. Confidence is largely built on the way people respond to you, aka “the specific reaction achieved”. That’s basic social conditioning and we’re all susceptible to it to some degree or another.

      • Emma the Emo says:

        Sure, we’re not completely impenetrable to people’s opinions, and need at least a little approval from somebody. I would accept this reasoning if we were talking about being disfigured and working on making oneself look better every day. But we’re talking about normal women doing bare-faced. Surely our weak points should be about something more important than that?

        Confidence comes from other people in some ways. I think truly confident people care about opinions of those whom they consider an expert, or their loved ones. But deriving confidence from strangers, especially on such trivial matters as makeup, sounds unhealthy to me.

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  9. Jay says:

    Masturbation feels good. Its really quite that simple. And while I would prefer having sex with “reasonably” attractive women regularly this does not relegate masturbation to some disappointing substitute. Its, in and of itself, a positive. Orgasm is an intense feeling, does how I get there matter that much? Ive had sex with women who I don’t fancy, I’d prefer porn or even memories to them to be honest. Its no offence meant, it may be I don’t do it for them either. If some regard that as some kind of mental dysfunction then I’m happy to be dysfunctional.

    Sex is sex, dont need to be about love, or intimacy for me. Not that I woudnt want those things just that they I dont need them simultaneously with sex.

    • emmatheemo says:

      Thanks for sharing your thoughts. And I don’t view it as a dysfunction to prefer masturbation to women you are simply not very attracted to. However, I must ask you about this:

      “Orgasm is an intense feeling, does how I get there matter that much?” – would you say the same if you had to rely on masturbation for your orgasms? If the women you are attracted to weren’t availible to you? I’m just curious and would like to know this. I also remember reading that the body knows the difference between sex and masturbation, and will react differently with testosterone levels. Will have to dig that up though, to verify. But it doesn’t sound far-fetched, as the brain and the body are not separate entities, and our hormones are affected by the conscious too.

      Perhaps it’s just my understanding of things, but saying “destiny to orgasm doesn’t matter” ignores all those things that happen during sex, which do not happen during masturbation. I just don’t believe most people have sex solely to achieve an orgasm, or that our sexual needs boil down to that only. If that was so, we wouldn’t reproduce for as long as we did. Of course, it doesn’t forbid the existence or validity of outliers.

      • Jay says:

        The point is that masturbation and sex are not in competition for me. It feels good so I do it. Its highly likely that I would still masturbate fairly regularly even if I was with someone in LTR, or in some sort of FWB deal. Given the lifestyle I lead, and the person Ive become, I’m not really a great catch for most women. Plus my physical appearance is not going to create the tingle factor. This I think is just reality. I would suggest that, like most men, the only way I’m getting regular sex is thru LTR model. The costs, in time and money are too high for me. It means personal development, getting off the booze etc etc. When I have had satisfying sex it is defo preferable to masturbation, and clearly body contact must be at the heart of it. However, sex with unattractive women is just not motivating to me, they might be nice I might get on with them but without that base urge theres no point for me.

        To what extent do you think that Eivind’s stand is a kind of status display for you?

      • emmatheemo says:

        “However, sex with unattractive women is just not motivating to me, they might be nice I might get on with them but without that base urge theres no point for me.” – Ok.

        “To what extent do you think that Eivind’s stand is a kind of status display for you?” – which stand is that?

    • Emma the Emo says:

      “all those things that happen during sex, which do not happen during masturbation.” – by those things, I don’t mean love or intimacy. But everything else that makes sex sex. Perhaps the conscious awareness that you had contact with another person, and physical touching of another person. Perhaps there is something else.

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