Some say girls who fall for game, with all its teasing, negs and dismissive treatment, just have “low self-esteem”. I think people who say that got it completely backwards.
An insecure, low self-esteem woman will have a very low tolerance for dread game. In fact, the man could be doing absolutely nothing, and she will generate feelings of dread within herself all on her own. Options, all by themselves, will make her worry. And it takes very little to make her despair and wonder if it’s all over.
There is a great Shakespeare play which exemplifies this, called “Othello”. Shakespeare was a good observer of human behavior. Yes, the main character is male, and it makes things a bit different, but I think low self-esteem works in similar ways when it comes to love and jealousy. The story is about many things other than jealousy stemming from insecurity, but it’s a huge part of it. Othello, being the only rare black man in Venice, is swayed by a toxic, lying “friend” Iago, who convinces him his Venetian wife is cheating on him. It works, partially because Iago’s tricks were convincing, and partially because Othello doubted a Venetian woman could truly love a black guy like him (how the times have changed…). Here’s a humorous summary to the story:
Thus, I would predict that most women who date alphas would be secure and have healthy self-esteem. The low self-esteem insecure women would simply not last very long in such conditions. They will either be dumped for jealous behavior, or dump the man to prevent him from doing it first.
That is not to say low self-esteem women are less attracted to alphas or various confident jerks. I just don’t think they are more attracted to them.
One could argue that only low self-esteem women stay with dismissive dread-gaming men, because they don’t think they deserve any better. But for that to happen, these women have to choose these men in the first place.
What do you think? Does low self-esteem lead women to dating gaming, dread-using, aloof men?