Western Men vs Russian Men

Recently I was watching those extreme makeover shows, where they take a tired old woman and make her look like a youthful fresh woman. I was surprised by certain differences between the English-speaking (Australian, British, American..) versions and the Russian ones. And while I’m aware that reality TV is not real, I can’t help but feel the differences reflect differences in cultures.

In the Western shows, the woman could be a single mom, but most often she has a supportive husband who loves her and just wants her to feel better about herself (and probably have sex with him more as a result).

In the Russian shows, things are a lot less comfortable for the woman. She might just be tired from taking care of a chronically ill toddler, but her husband is already halfway out the door, and feels too embarrassed to take her to office parties. Or he already left her for a younger woman, and she is on the show to pick herself up. Or she’s being beaten. One woman even came on the show to improve herself for the time when her boyfriend comes out of jail, which is where she found him in the first place. It’s horrifying stuff. Many of these women probably need a therapist more than they need a makeover.

I only lived in Russia until age 12, so I don’t know how the dating scene really is. But my mom lived there much longer. She told me that these shows do reflect certain cultural themes. For a long time, there’s been a man shortage in Russia, first due to WW2 and then possibly due to a short male life expectancy. It makes women desperate, and gives certain men the opportunity to be naughty. Also, Russia doesn’t have the same beliefs. In Russia, you can say stuff that in USA would create a feminist uproar.

Manosphere men complain so much about Western women, and how crappy their attitudes are, because they are allowed to have them. All because of feminism and too many options. Perhaps certain Russian men are like those Western women – not particularly attractive, ask for a lot and give too little? Perhaps the gender with the most options gets the opportunity to be naughty and has members that abuse their options? If that’s so, I think I like Western (specifically Norwegian) men more than the Russian ones. It’s no surprise I’m dating one. Perhaps I’m doing so for the same reason many Western men like Asian women.

P.S.: I’m not saying Russian men are generally bad. All men in my family are/were great. But because Russian men have more options, they are naughtier to women on average.

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21 Responses to Western Men vs Russian Men

  1. In America, you go on TV. In Russia, TV goes on you! What a country!

    A serious man shortage, eh? I heard there’s a similar problem in New Zealand… perhaps I should move to one of those countries. Then I might have better luck. 😀

    • Emma the Emo says:

      Haha, perhaps it could work 🙂 Generally it helps to move where the ratio is in your favor.

      I gotta say I didn’t get the tv joke. I feel a bit dumb, because it sounds familiar :S

      • I was riffing off of old Yakov Smirnoff routines.

      • Emma the Emo says:

        Oh, got it 🙂

        I haven’t seen this guy before, but now I know who it is 🙂

      • Glad you two have finally met. But yeah, he’s the one who started these “In Soviet Russia…” jokes. People ran with it and started making jokes like “In America, you wear clothes. In Russia, clothes wear you! What a country!” or “In America, you hit traffic. In Russia, traffic hit you! What a country!” etc. etc.

      • Emma the Emo says:

        Lol, traffic sure hits you in Russia. And everyone bribes traffic cops when caught speeding.

      • I’ve noticed that everyone seems to have a dashcam there…

      • Liz says:

        Yakov Smirnoff’s popularity fell with the fall of the iron curtain though. Funny the stuff we used to believe about the eastern blok countries. The biggest piece of propaganda was the belief that the women were all ugly. Even when Paulina Porizkova came over we were like, “Oh, wow! That’s weird. She must be the only pretty girl behind the iron curtain…” And then, the iron curtain fell and everyone saw what they were hiding. We were well and totally duped. 🙂

  2. Liz says:

    Wasn’t equality pushed as the ideal under Communism? Forcing children into childcare facilities so mothers could work for the state instead of staying home to raise them, ubiquitous on demand abortiona, and so forth seem like feminist ideals. I don’t know that much about Russia…am I mistaken? Because from the facts I’m familiar with equality has been touted for decades and this is the end result. I’ll bet China would be the same without those abortion policies that have shifted the demographics.
    I have an acquaintance who owns a business in Columbia. Some sort of military contracting thing…he works with Russians too. He mentioned the time he met a Russian business associate in Las Vegas. He stepped out of his private jet and two women followed. He said that both the women looked like Victoria Secret models. The man pointed to one and told her to go back home, and kept the other (she was paid for her inconvenience). During the meetings/diners that followed, the one time the girl spoke out of turn the man slapped her severely across the face. He said it was really hard but she didn’t make a sound, or cry, just held her cheek. She too, was very well compensated. I can’t remember how much he said she was paid but I remember thinking…whoa, that’s probably enough to get slapped around a little bit for a weekend, if one is really short of options. Didn’t sound like the type of lifestyle or environment that would cultivate good people, but a rich Russian military contractor (or whatever he was) is probably not the best window into Russian society…but it does say something that it is the type of society where people like that prosper and flourish.

    • Emma the Emo says:

      I don’t remember all the history. My mom told me that when she was around my age, they actually had a law against not working. You could be convicted, and be forced to work somewhere. However, men and women weren’t barred from marrying and creating a traditional division of labor. The woman could stay at home with the kids if her husband supported her, and she’d be a subject of envy.

      Off topic, but mom also told me it was hard to stay jobless during that time even without the law, as jobs were everywhere and you didn’t need fancy education for every little position.

      • Eric says:

        I read in ‘Pravda’ recently that Putin had instituted a program a few years ago to subsidize married women who chose to stay at home and raise families. Putin pointed in a speech before their parliament (the policy was up for renewal) that it had lowered the divorce rate radically, along with domestic violence reports, and that families were raising more children.

        I’m not a huge believer in the welfare state, but Putin’s idea is an interesting concept: subsidizing people who do the right thing.

      • Liz says:

        Eric, I tend to think that programs like that can work well if there is some source of underlying…searching for the word, but it escapes me. ‘Pride’ perhaps. The feeling of moral obligation and responsibility toward others. Some people think the source for something like that is homogeneity, but I don’t think so…in the US, we were once a nation like that, filled with immigrants from around the globe. But everyone had a sense of nationalistic pride in being American. Isolated religious groups have this ‘pride’ as well…the Amish, for example, flourish very well this way as did monasteries and convents for centuries. Families do this as well. I think the ‘welfare state’ doesn’t work largely due to the sense of entitlement (“you owe me”), rather than responsibility (“I owe you”).

        Anyway, it was always interesting to me that Germany did phenomenally well by paying mothers to stay at home with their children…until immigrants en masse began to take advantage. The immigrants had a different paradigm and culture and didn’t feel as much a part of German society (a society that traditionally had a lot of cohesive cultural pride and sense of duty/obligation).

    • Emma the Emo says:

      And I think your story sounds a bit extreme. Most Russians are not that powerful. But I’m sure higher classes in all countries get to do what they want, although some hide it more than others.

  3. Eric says:

    What you said about Russian men applies a lot to Latin America too—except Russian men are usually also gainfully employed LOL

  4. bo jangles says:

    It actually started even earlier, the russian revolution killed off a larger percentage of men than ww2, it was in the 20s if memory serves. It even had an effect on Azerbaijan-the muslim women there wear provocative clothes, and it comes from the competition for men in that time period. Anyways you really see the differences in some countries, the attitude between Panamanian women and Colombian women(adjacent countries) is incredible. One had long term economic stability provided by the canal, the other has had more or less continuous wars for 70 years. Panamanian women hate it when Colombian women come, because they steal all the best men. Don’t you hate it when someone else gets what you want because they are willing to do more to get it?

  5. FuriousFerret says:

    I totally believe that the Russian guys are equivalent to the American women:


    is probably dating this:

  6. Shee says:


    Sex ratio has a huge impact on the culture of dating. The link above shows that men are willing to commit more when there is a shortage of women. This is particularly interesting because in this situation the age when women marry goes down which goes against the manosphere narrative of womens hypergamy of not wanting to settle if options are available.

    • Emma the Emo says:

      That’s very interesting, thanks for bringing it here. I just checked, and age of first marriage for women is 24,9 in Russia, 27 in USA and 31 in Norway (and those countries are listed in the order of increasing female scarcity) – http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Age_at_first_marriage . Perhaps there is more to the age of marriage than the number of mates available. I mentioned culture. If your study is reflecting the truth, then maybe ratio itself doesn’t cause an older age of first marriage for women. Perhaps feminist culture causes the older age, and the sex ratio stays high because the country is rich and peaceful (and males lives are thus spared), which often brings feminism. Just speculating of course, but it would be interesting to see what other bloggers have to say.

  7. Shee says:

    I wondering where the 24.9 number is coming from for Russia. I clicked on the reference link on the Wikipedia page and it took me here ~ http://rbth.com/society/2014/11/25/marriage_no_thanks_im_too_busy_why_russians_are_delaying_tying_the_kn_41673.html

    The article talks about the marriage age for both Russian men and women are increasing.

    “The year 2013 was the first year in 50 years in which the majority of grooms and brides were in the older group (at the age of 25-34), 619,534 and 521,389 accordingly.”

  8. Matthew Chiglinsky says:

    The two Russian men I’ve run across in my career in computer software (her in America) both had unusually big muscles (in tight shirts) and acted like overly masculine aggressive jerks. It surprised me that such tough guys would be in such an intellectual field of study, and it gave me the impression that it must just be normal for Russian guys to be like this. Now, you seem to be confirming that.

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